CLOTHESLINE

[Dagooos]

Hi, ya all

 

For the last three weeks I have been putting a ridiculous amount of time into my first short

 

It's called "CLOTHESLINE"

 

It's a romantic comedy about a sex starved desert roaming psycho

 

I have 8 shots done, well almost done I still have to go back and fix intersections and what not (out of 10) and may add a couple more but at this point I am pretty sure I will finish, if I keep making enough coffee

 

It will be about two minutes long, includes three characters and be rendered in version 12 to take advantage of the new composite and cloth features.

 

oh, and its timed to Rush 2112

 

This is the third shot

 

shot 3

[jamagica]

animation is great! perfect expression and smooth

[higginsdj]

David - that looks great. Nice and clean with lovely weight, anticipation and followthrough.

 

Just some personal observations though.

1. On entry I get the feeling he is running from something (or bing chased) and he is puffed out. Not sure why you have him banging his head.

 

2. You tell the story very well from there on but I am a little confused where his attention actually is. At some points it is definitely off stage left and at other points I feel he is looking at me - the viewer - but other times I'm just not real sure.

 

3. Did you consider having the flower bend into this nose when he took the real deep sniff?

 

Cheers

[zacktaich]

That looks really great. Great animation, great style, nice colors. I really like this piece. I can't wait to see where you go with this.

 

Zack

[johnl3d]

I liked it alot good animating !!!

[JTalbotski]

Oh, yeah! It's good to see more of your work, David. Very nice! Did he miss getting picked up by a car at the beginning? Is that why he looked depressed? I love the snappy poses and little details like his toes wiggling when he jumps.

 

I'm really looking forward to the final animation,

 

Jim

[NancyGormezano]

Fantastic - wonderfully appealing guy - perfect animation - Bravo!

[Vash]

It's a romantic comedy about a sex starved desert roaming psycho

Um okay. He looks pretty good. He told a story just in his expressions. Not sure what it was... But like Jamagica said the expresions are good and smooth.

[starwarsguy]

Where have you been hiding?

[Mr. Jaqe]

Where have you been hiding? 

oh! oh! let me guess! Sweeden? A swiss bank box? the container outside my house? no? dang. But I loved the animation, he really looked like a "sex starved desert roaming psycho".

[modernhorse]

Very good so far. I really like the setting and the colors. In particular I like how you're animating him, very Warner-ish. I'd love to see his eyes pop out of his head when he spots her (or whatever he spots). I think the tongue reads very well. Keep on it man. I'll raise a cup of coffee to you while I'm working on mine.

 

Doug

[Dagooos]

Thanks for all the comments!

 

 

David - that looks great.  Nice and clean with lovely weight, anticipation and followthrough.

 

Just some personal observations though. 

1.  On entry I get the feeling he is running from something (or bing chased) and he is puffed out.  Not sure why you have him banging his head.

 

2.  You tell the story very well from there on but I am a little confused where his attention actually is.  At some points it is definitely off stage left and at other points I feel he is looking at me - the viewer - but other times I'm just not real sure.

 

3.  Did you consider having the flower bend into this nose when he took the real deep sniff?

 

Cheers

Thanks for the comments David. Good to see you back!

 

1. you are pretty close

 

2. I agree about the eyes his attention should be going off stage left but they seem to be floating around now

 

3. yep the flower was doing exactly that but seem to have lost it somewhere down the line. Will check that out.

 

 

Oh, yeah! It's good to see more of your work, David. Very nice! Did he miss getting picked up by a car at the beginning? Is that why he looked depressed? I love the snappy poses and little details like his toes wiggling when he jumps.

 

I'm really looking forward to the final animation,

 

Jim

Thanks Jim,

 

I know the shot doesn't make much sense now. It was just a random shot I picked out thinking it wouldn't give too much away.

but I can say this guy defiantly doesn't need a car

 

 

Where have you been hiding? 

I cant really say but I have been watching you like a hawk

 

 

Very good so far.  I really like the setting and the colors.  In particular I like how you're animating him, very Warner-ish.  I'd love to see his eyes pop out of his head when he spots her (or whatever he spots).  I think the tongue reads very well.  Keep on it man.  I'll raise a cup of coffee to you while I'm working on mine. 

 

Doug

Hi Doug,

 

That made my day. Warner-ish is exactly what I am trying for with lots of cartoon sound effect stuff.

 

Thanks

[KenH]

Looks really good! Just one thing...in shot 3 above his right arm goes through his body when he jumps to the right.

[PlJack]

Where have you been hiding?

I had the same thought.

 

Great work.

[Vash]

Where have you been hiding?

???????????????????????????

Ohhh. Oh yeah. Couldn't you have had his arm attatched from his body too? I mean like his feet are? That could even up what Uhhhhhhh KenH was talking about. Really I didn't see any problem on Uhhhhhh Shot three.

[Paul Forwood]

That is GREAT!

Loved everything about it but would prefer to see some dynamics in the flower and his belly. (just a little)

 

Bravo!

[itsjustme]

Wow, very cool stuff so far, David. Sounds like you're chugging along nicely too. I can't wait for the finished product!

[pixelmech]

Wonderful work! I agree it is a bit warnerish which I like. Looking forward to seeing it.

[dimos]

I usually don't post to critique or praise anybody. I think I have only done it for the folks at SoulCage (because there damn good). Well sir, I must tell you from what I have seen so far........YOU'RE DAMN GOOD!

 

1. Character design is simple yet refreshing!

 

2. Animation is very Warner-ish with a hint of the good ol'Disney-ish. Which is my personal favourite (canadian spelling) combination, because it's what inspired me to get into the animation industry.

 

3. As far as the critique about the story telling, well I can't critique it because the story is in the whole picture, not just the one scene, but I felt that what the character was doing was very clear. Although I felt some expressions could be "pushed" a little more in some places. It would help to improve on the Warner-ish feel.

 

Thanks for sharing. It was my pleasure to watch it.

 

Dimos

[Dagooos]

Thanks Guys for all the comments!

 

@ Paul Forwood - I do have alot of dynamics in the short just not on this character though I think it would be nice though to have the belly wiggle just a bit. Maybe I will try to add this with a dynamic constraint and some smartskin or something. The flower I will probably just animate by hand.

 

@dimos - Damn, thats got to be the best compliment I have ever got. Thank you

[amarillospider]

Great look and style. Just curious what kind of rigging challenges and solutions you've had with this character. It seems difficult to rig plumper characters, especially when their lower and upper bodies are kind of 1 blob.

Looking forward to seeing the rest! Is this for the animated contest? I better go wack some more at my entry to try and catch up

 

-Alonso

[Dagooos]

Great look and style.  Just curious what kind of rigging challenges and solutions you've had with this character.  It seems difficult to rig plumper characters, especially when their lower and upper bodies are kind of 1 blob.

Looking forward to seeing the rest! Is this for the animated contest? I better go wack some more at my entry to try and catch up

 

-Alonso

Hi Alonso,

 

For the rigging I used TSM, It was pretty simple to set up , doesn't even have fan bones. I just used the A:M weights with three spine bones in the center of the character, set the weights by hand and it seems to be working rather well. The facial stuff is pose sliders and six additional bones to tweak the mouth shapes.

The squash and stretch of the eyes are controlled with a null which is a child of the head.

I wasn't planning on entering the contest but its a possibility

 

almost forgot, the "animation bootcamp" very cool

[Dagooos]

Still pecking away at the short heres another shot though not completely finished pretty close to what it will look like.

 

http://www.5000hp.com/animations/speed.mov

 

 

I am using Yves skylight rig with 8 lights Thinking this will be finished look maybe one more light for shadows.

 

 

and if anyone wants to help out with the sound effects i'm all for collaboration

[JoshB]

Alright I'll throw another log on the fire. Good style for the character simple yet very effective. I like the animation for the same reasons everyone else did WB, Disney (mostly WB though). The textures are great it's got almost a clay like aspect to it.

 

Only concern I have. When I watched the first animation it didn't bother me that much, but in the second one it did. The contrast between the character and the background. To use a good reference to explain I pick the road runner. Road Runner light and dark blue against an orange background. Complimentary colors which make him stand out from the background. Wil E. Coyote (super genious) dark brown. Again, against and orange background dark against relatively light making him stand out from the background. If you could figure out a way to get him to become more seperate from the background I think it would take it over the top.

 

Further, the background seems REALLY saturated (could just be my monitor) and draws my attention away from the animation and character a little bit.

 

Keep up the good work.

 

J

[heyvern]

...I am pretty sure I will finish, if I keep making enough coffee...

You see? You see!?

 

Another person who needs an AM feature that activates a coffee maker via an ethernet connection whenever a render to file will take longer than a predetermined length of time (mine would be set at 1 minute... but that's just me).

 

I don't think there is any other 3D application with this feature.

 

p.s. By the way... excelent animation. I am looking forward to the completion of your project... WAWA has 64 oz. coffee mugs now... that's a whole pot of coffee in a easy to carry insulated mug.

 

Vernon "!" Zehr

[Animus]

I want to see more. I want to see more. I want to see more.

 

Love your design!

 

Michel

[johnl3d]

Fantastic

[pixelmech]

I really enjoy watching that clip! I do have to agree with Josh, something about his coloring is definitely not working. In this latest clip he is this pale green (or seems to be with the lighting) and he doesn't seem to fit somehow.

 

The lighting does look great though. I'm not sure what color adjustment so suggest, but the complimentary color suggestion is probably a good area to tweak in. Just my .02

 

Really looking forward to seeing some more! Would you mind posting a wireframe of your character?

[John Keates]

That was really nice! I love that style. The animation is lively and I really like the set/use of colour.

 

One thing that I would suggest is that you keep the body moving just a little bit even when it isn't really going anywhere. At the moment it has a stop-start thing. I know that is the style of the animation but perhaps just a little more movement would boost the sense of life a little further?

[John Keates]

I got drawn back to these animations for another look. I hope you finish this.

 

One thing that I would like to happen is for his left hand to wobble when he sniffs the flower in the first clip.

 

Just a suggestion.

[Dagooos]

Thanks For the comments

 

Josh what are you babbling about? sorry couldn't resist

 

I agree with what you said about about the background. Played around with it a little more tonight trying to get character to stand out better.

 

REVISED BACKGROUND

 

@ John - thanks for the suggestions but are you sure you mean the left hand not the right hand with flower. If I wobbled the left hand it would have to be very slight or it would lead the eye away

 

@pixelmesh here is wireframe 1496 patches mostly in the teeth

 

[ChrisThom]

I like the background colors you got. Is a material pasted onto a scrim or what?

[NancyGormezano]

I love the coloring! don't change it - I think it's the way some peoples monitors are calibrated - He shows up wonderfully here...Also I think his motion is terrific & well suited to the character...I'm really looking forward to seeing the completed piece -

[JoshB]

Now THAT'S what I was babbling about.

 

It gives a lot more depth to the frame. Wonderful difference cloud like effect to keep it from being flat. Lovely, lovely, lovely. Se manufique (I don't speak, read, or write French--so if it's wrong feel free to correct me--but it matters not to the thread).

 

J

[pixelmech]

I think it looks better too. And thanks for the wires! I notice you didn't connect the arms to the torso - curious why. From your animating skills though - it doesn't seem to matter!

[modernhorse]

OH BABY !!! That looks fantastic now. Much more atmospheric too.

 

Doug

[Dagooos]

Hi there,

 

Still working on short, though real work has slowed it down a bit.

Here is the current shot I am working on. Just trying keep my thread alive

 

http://www.5000hp.com/animations/doc.mov

[JTalbotski]

Ha! Okay....this is getting wierder and wierder! But I'm looking forward to seeing more.

 

Jim

[NancyGormezano]

that is so funny - I love love love it - great animation - absolutely adorable loveable characters - cute cute cute - this is such a winner - destined for fame! can't say enough about how appealing it is...

[Dhar]

LOL Great work!

 

After viewing the clip few times I find myself wanting to add a little squish to the character as the doctor presses down on him.

 

Just a suggestion.

 

Keep up the good work!

[JoshB]

That was just wrong.

 

Good work. Nice depth. And it have a wonderful clay like quality. I'm enjoying it.

 

J

[Dagooos]

Thanks for all the comments!

 

I was hoping it wouldn't be too offending to anyone It was just meant to be a fun gag that allowed me to switch the models up.

 

Dhar - I think you are right about the squash It doesn't show any weight I think I will revise it and make her body squash a little and make the beds wheels squash and bend out a little too.

[NancyGormezano]

 

Like I said before: I love what you're doing - but given that you've now revealed some details of what you had in mind - I can say I didn't catch on, perhaps it will read better seeing the whole thing. So for a critique:

 

her body

1) It wasn't obvious to me that the pink guy is really a gal ... and

 

I was hoping it wouldn't be too offending to anyone

2) Not obvious what that "thingy" at the end popping up is supposed to be - I think I know now. My husband noticed and asked "what is that?" I didn't even notice it. Might be a guy thing. I just thought it was the body deforming, from being squished.

 

I repeat - I loved it - & perhaps the sequence read's better in context with the rest of the movie.

[Gerry]

This is fun and really looking great. that background still seems dominant. Maybe try reversing the gradient, so it gets lighter as it gets closer to the ground. This may keep it from drawing the eye too much.

 

If you still want some help with the soundtrack I'm game!

[Dagooos]

 

her body

1) It wasn't obvious to me that the pink guy is really a gal ... and

 

I was hoping it wouldn't be too offending to anyone

2) Not obvious what that "thingy" at the end popping up is supposed to be - I think I know now. My husband noticed and asked "what is that?" I didn't even notice it. Might be a guy thing. I just thought it was the body deforming, from being squished.

 

I repeat - I loved it - & perhaps the sequence read's better in context with the rest of the movie.

Hmmm. this is what I was curious about. It sounds like it doesn't read as well as I thought.

 

The things in the doctors hands are suppose to be implants, that he just slaps on her.

 

In the shot before this one she wants the male character to do something but he doesn't want too. So she comes up with this idea to change his mind.

 

maybe a different camera angle or something to make it more clear.

 

thanks for the critique

[modernhorse]

maybe a different camera angle or something to make it more clear.

Stupid me, I read the posts while downloading the clip, but it was pretty readable to me.

 

But another angle might help get the point across better.

 

Very nice, snappy animation on the doctor. I like how you make these objects (exam table, implants) just appear. Very ACME. His face after applying the implants is perfect. He looks like he likes them and he also looks a bit loony.

 

Looking forward to more.

 

Doug

[KenH]

LOL What a strange animation! Why's the thread called clothesline? I keep missing the thread because I think to myself....someone wants to know how to model a clothesline?

 

Anyway, I could never make an animation like this....I'd be all like "How does the hospital trolly just unfold like that?" Hah You have you're own style and I like it.

 

I have to agree about the implants. I didn't even notice anything in the guys hands at first. They should be the same size as the finished breasts IMO. Also, the breasts seem too far down the body....I thought he had opened her stomach or something.

I think a camera sweep could solve it though to give a 3D perspective of them.

 

PS Should the guys nose be green?

[Dagooos]

LOL What a strange animation! Why's the thread called clothesline? I keep missing the thread because I think to myself....someone wants to know how to model a clothesline?

I called it clothesline because thats the name of the short. Now that you mention it I should have made a short description of it under the name

 

Anyway, I could never make an animation like this....I'd be all like "How does the hospital trolly just unfold like that?" Hah You have you're own style and I like it.

The hospital trolly unfolding was a pose slider. thanks!

 

I have to agree about the implants. I didn't even notice anything in the guys hands at first. They should be the same size as the finished breasts IMO. Also, the breasts seem too far down the body....I thought he had opened her stomach or something.

Hmmmm gonna have to work on that. That is why I held them up for a long time so the viewer would see them and wonder what are those? I think you are right on that they should be bigger.

I agree they do look like they are too far down on the body but when she is standing up they seem to look right.

 

I think a camera sweep could solve it though to give a 3D perspective of them.

Yeas I think that may work

 

PS Should the guys nose be green?

 

I was wondering if anyone was going to notice that.

Actually, it should that was kind of an accident when I was modeling him. I changed it to green but went back to the white just to give him a little different look.

[JTalbotski]

Well, I thought he was wearing surgeon's gloves and was performing a sex change operation. Just pulling new parts out of the pink "male" character.

 

Jim

[Paul Forwood]

I love this work, Dagooos!

 

The implant joke needs to be more obvious. Try rendering a closeup of the surgeon holding up the bags and try to give some other clue as to what they are. Cut back to the long shot and get him to pinch up a flap of pink skin before stuffing in the bags. Just a suggestion. You could still follow with the squash and pop.

 

Great characters, great animation and great humour!