I haven't done much with hair, but I've sometimes wondered if something could be gained by scaling the time after a simulation.
Like maybe the hyperactivity of the cloth could be reduced by animating my character for five seconds, stretching that out to 10 seconds, setting the cloth to half its mass, simulating it, then scaling everything back to 5 seconds.
Not that that is the right recipe, but maybe time scaling might get an effect not possible otherwise.