Post Project Blues

[largento]

Man oh man, I've had post project blues before, but never for this prolonged a time.

 

It's a weird thing. You work on this project that takes up all of your time and it's the reason you get up in the morning and the reason you are so late going to bed. Then in the last stretch, it's exhausting and it's tough sticking with it to the end.

 

And then it's over ...and that's it.

 

Suddenly you don't have to get out of bed in the morning, your reason for being seems to have just checked out.

 

I've been trying to jump back into another project, but I can't seem to break out of this funk.

 

Part of me just thinks that it was such a prolonged marathon of work that I just need more time to recover. There's also that element of the pain of the last part of it being too fresh in my mind. Some friends and I used to go canoeing once a year when we were in high school and college. By the end of the trip, I was usually horribly sunburned and exhausted and trying to remember why I thought this was fun. But then, a year later, I'd forget about all the suffering and want to do it again.

 

I don't guess enough time has passed for me to have forgotten how hard it was to do that last project. :-)

 

Add to it all the normal life problems (my younger brother has been diagnosed with hodgkin's lymphoma, a highly treatable cancer, but one that still will require six months of chemo and he's symptomatic, so he's in pain and shrinking down), and I'm just not being able to turn over the engine with my worn-out spark plugs.

 

I'm certain it will pass, but I'm going to stop announcing projects until I have one that makes it past the initial "hey, that'd be fun to do" stage.

[robcat2075]

I feel your pain. It seems like the more I learned about animation, the more I dreaded embarking on the long journey.

 

One of the Nine Old Men said "I don't like animating, I like having animated."

[Gerry]

Funny Mark, I'm in the same low energy spot. Vicki and I had a rush of activity for several weeks and I was working day and night on "Nightcallers" and then I just hit a wall and been floundering. I blame it on Summer, the heat, the natural ebb and flow of work energy, etc. I feel like it's just starting to pass but I'm also not in a hurry to start the race again. I'm just giving it time.

 

Very sorry to hear about your brother, also. That kind of thing is its own energy-sucker and would have an effect even without the letdown of your project ending.

 

I also have a theory about the election season and the twists and turns political discourse seem to have taken just lately. I think people are taking a breath because no one is sure who they're supposed to be mad at anymore, but that's just how it seems from inside the NY bubble. But there's definitely a sense of inertia permeating everything.

 

Roll with it, it'll pass and you'll be having fun one day soon and thinking, "oh yeah, THIS is what it used to feel like!"

[NancyGormezano]

And then it's over ...and that's it.

 

It's the creation process that's the fun, not the product. That's why Sarah Winchester never finished remodeling her Mystery House. That's why there are cliffhangers.

 

It will come back. The spark will come back. It always does. It will probably come back in a different shape, form.

 

If you're like me, you've been here before. You've doubted you could do it again. Trust that the urge, necessity always comes back. And it comes back better.

 

For me, burnout happens when expectations don't happen. Immediately. And when there isn't a balance of activities. That's why marathon sessions of creating, to the exclusion of all else, isn't such a hot idea.

 

You need that canoe trip to revive the juices. Step away from the desk, get out and walk, bike ride, something new. I always find my creative spirit comes back while I'm on a trip. New ideas, new sights, experiences, add to recharging the battery.

 

Everything you've done so far adds to what you are still destined to do. It just may not be obvious right now.

 

Very, very sorry to hear of your brother's situation. That's a tough road, but like you said, it's treatable. Give yourself time to process this.

 

Try to prioritize and balance your time based on what's happening.

[Shelton]

I agree with you Nancy!

 

I have been in a funk for a while. I have been working with Chris Dailey on the rear window project and it has helped get things going again, but it wasn't until I was in the mountains of New Mexico on a road trip out to California did things seem to go "aha". All of sudden I got excited about all the projects we are working on! Something cleared and I can not tell you what. But I found that the second half of the trip I was wanting to get back and start up again.

 

Mark, sorry to hear about your brother as well.

 

Steve

[itsjustme]

Looking at a mountain is very intimidating...looking at the small hill you're climbing on that mountain isn't. Small goals add up to bigger projects. Any small thing you work on can give you an idea. Those ideas can be cobbled together into something very eclectic and more interesting as a result.

 

When I'm stuck, I work on things that I know I'll eventually need no matter what the project is...a set of nuts and bolts, chairs, tables, light bulbs, etc. Then, those small things can be used to make more objects (there are bolts, nuts and screws on tons of objects). Building a library of such things is very helpful and keeps things moving forward during lulls in motivation.

 

I think your funk will be short-lived, Mark.

 

I'll send some positive energy toward your brother and hope he has a speedy recovery.

[robcat2075]

Hey, Mark, i didn't see the part about your brother being sick. That's not good. I hope you're not the one who has to supervise him through this, that would take a lot out of you.

 

About 10 years ago my doctor told me I had Hodgkin's Lymphoma and sent me to a cancer specialist. That guy operated to take a big lump out of my neck, but after they got done looking at that they found it wasn't cancer at all, it was a bartonella infection... AKA "catscratch fever". I wish it were that simple for your brother but it sounds like he's a more certain case than I was. I hope the treatment goes well for him.

[largento]

Thanks, everyone. Especially for the well-wishes for my brother. My brother still lives in the same town as my parents. He's got the support of his wife and kids as well as our parents. I went out there for a couple of weeks in June when he first found out what it was and plan on returning in August for a week or so. He started his first chemo treatment yesterday. The doctor says that even though he is in stage 4, his chances of surviving are 90%. We're all staying positive.

 

That's extremely lucky, Robert. My brother's lucky in a way, too, since it's treatable.

 

Thanks, David. I'm usually pretty good at that (doing a little each day), but I'm just coming up blank for some reason.

 

I should try to get away, Nancy. I have some freelance work that I finally got paid for, but with the uncertainty of the rest of the year, I've been planning on hanging on to it. I've even toyed with the idea of just staying in a hotel for a couple of days and see if I could do some writing. Writing for me usually comes easily, but I need isolation to do it. The tiniest interruption destroys my concentration.

 

I'm sure I'll get out of this funk, though.

 

I'm just going to stop announcing new projects in threads until I'm sure. :-)

[zandoriastudios]

Maybe you do the next "stalled trek", even though you aren't inspired. You have an audience and momentum--do the work. Often inspiration comes when you're working.

[largento]

I think there's something to that, Will. I think part of the hold up is that I haven't written anything and I've been toying with the idea of just doing a "my eyes only" comic book which would allow me to write as I go and maybe get over the blank page problem. I was looking around for drawing apps for the iPad, thinking it would be fun just to do it on that.

[mouseman]

Another thing to consider might be getting a collaborator. At its best, collaboration is far more than the sum of its parts.

[robcat2075]

Working alone is boring, but working with other people is maddening. I have yet to find the right balance.

[Gerry]

I guess I'm lucky, I don't find working alone boring in the least! So far anyway.

[largento]

I'm in Gerry's group. I enjoy working by myself and do better when I have autonimity. I don't mind working with others, but it can be frustrating.

 

I'm an introvert, so my normal state is inside my head. I find it takes much more energy for me to be social.

[Sean delgatto]

Yeah I know how that is, I just got done with hallows' eve and started submitting it to film fests.

 

But then I switched up to a new project to get over the old one. The two are polar opposites, one is a period piece abotu a guy that fights eveil to save his village, then switched up to a space sci-fi story. I found changing genre helps get back on the saddle.

[kwhitaker]

Finishing a project is almost like reading a great book, i want to know the ending, but then hate for the journey to end.

So sorry to hear about your brother. 20 years ago my oldest daughter had cancer, its too was operable. but i lost a whole year, I didn't know what the heck i was doing.

You have a artist soul, Mark . Hang in there, you'll get inspiration form the oddest thing, and be off and running again.

[largento]

@Sean: That may be the case, Sean. I'm toying around with things, maybe one will stick.

 

@Katt: Thanks, Katt. I'm sure it will happen.