Meditation

[Sharky]

Hi Guys!

 

I finished my the Meditation animation and I would like to hear:

- What do you think my short movie?

- What have you been your comments about my animation skill, texture skill and model skill?

 

My movie is 10 Mb and its format is .mov.

 

Meditation

 

Ps.: I'm waiting the comments...

 

Cheers,

 

Sharky

[Pengy]

Good job on the lighting,modeling and texturing. Not really much animating there to comment on. I also thing you could have cut it by half and still had the same effect. Unless this is part of a larger story I don't think it needs to be so long. I kept waiting for something to happen.

[starwarsguy]

The time between events should have definitely been shorter.

[Hutch]

Hey Sharky, everything looked pretty good to me! I do agree that it was probably alot longer than it needed to be but I didn't mind so much because I love the music. What is the song?

[modernhorse]

Sharky -

Hey great job. I think you have achieved a mood(y) piece of animation here, and from your title I presume that is what you were going for.

 

The title sequence, though looking good, took too long for me. I didn't see the need to spend as much time on that.

 

I too will weigh in on the length feeling a tad too long, particularly when you return to the same view a couple of times. Perhaps returning to that scene but from a different camera angle (maybe from the top ?) might break up monotony a bit.

 

The lighting is good but I felt it was a bit dark. Again, this is subjective so if you're pleased with it then ignore me.

 

Congrats on getting this far. I think with some minor rework it could be even stronger.

 

Doug

[ypoissant]

I have to concur with the rest of the critique. I also found the clip way too long. And I actually had to reason myself not to close it before the end.

 

I think your concept is good. A meditative clip focusing on a meditating monk. Th music is nice too. But you need more variety in the point of views. All the shots are static. It would be easier for the viewer if you added long and very slow camera motions. Also a few shots which focuses on some details of the scene still with slow camera motions. Some close-ups on the monk face and hands too. Still with slow camera motions.

[KenH]

LOL If you speed it up it looks like he's "gettin' on down"...or in a mental assylum.

 

You picked a difficult topic to tackle. Sure, the animation required is probably minimal but it's harder to make it interesting then. Perhaps you could zoom into his mind and show what he's concentrating on?

 

The little animation (and set and effects) in this piece indicates you are more than capable of taking on more complex projects.

[Sharky]

Hi Guys!

 

For the first time I want to thank everybody, who wrote me down the own comments!

 

Yves Poissant wrote:

I also found the clip way too long

 

Doug wrote:

I too will weigh in on the length feeling a tad too long, particularly when you return to the same view a couple of times. Perhaps returning to that scene but from a different camera angle (maybe from the top ?) might break up monotony a bit.

 

Starwarsguy wrote:

The time between events should have definitely been shorter.

 

You could see right, that I have some long shot or repeating, but it had be the reason. It was the music. I wanted to strech my movie, how it will be shyncrone with shots and it will be long just like where I could cut the music!

 

Ken wrote:

The little animation (and set and effects) in this piece indicates you are more than capable of taking on more complex projects.

 

Thanks Ken, I have a complex project in my mind, but I haven't enough time in now and my machine (Pc) is very slow in the rendering. It was influence the constructional process of this movie.

 

Hutch wrote:

Hey Sharky, everything looked pretty good to me! I do agree that it was probably alot longer than it needed to be but I didn't mind so much because I love the music. What is the song?

 

Sorry, I don't know the perfect title, because I got it from one my freind,but I know that he got it from the one of Sensei!

 

Thanks everybody again and if you will have a little spare time ,then I will remastered this movie with some effects and camera motions or angels.

 

Cheers...

 

Sharky

[Sharky]

Hi Guys!

 

I'm here again, because I fixed my short movie's long!

Please check it again and write me your comments!

 

Here is the link: Meditation-shorter

 

Cheers...

 

Sharky

[ypoissant]

Check your link address. It doesn't work for me. I get a 404 error.

[Sharky]

The link is good just the uploading was finishing!

 

Check the link again!

 

Cheers..

 

Sharky

[jon]

sharky,

 

i like the mood.. you've captured the candlelight very well, but the flickering seems to flare up now and again... was this intended?

 

length is still an issue here: you can easily cut it down to one third of the latest running time.

 

i'd also second yves' suggestion to keep the camera in motion. where you do, it enhances the depth of the image, and well... keep things moving.

 

overall, i like the character and the setting.. maybe you could use some different framing? closeups of his head, hands, etc. show him off!

 

-jon

[jesshmusic]

Perhaps you could zoom into his mind and show what he's concentrating on?

That wouldn't be very interesting, he should be concentrating on absolute nothing! He is supposed to be clearing his mind.

 

I will check out the anim tonight, cause I'm at work. I look forward to it.

[wwoelbel]

Hi Sharky;

 

Thats not your average animation topic and it seems pretty tough to me. I think that overall it works well. I did have a couple of comments though. For me, the flare of the candle was much too strong. The room is well lit and the candle does not seem to be the source of the light yet it flickers like the light is from the candle. Have you considered giving him a hakama? Perhaps a wooden practice sword neatly in front of him? I think that you are trying to enforce that this is a student of Aikido (O-Sensei, Akido banner) and perhaps showing more of the distinctive elements of the Way could enhance the image. I also think that the "inner mind" sequences need to be punched up perhaps by literally zooming the camera into the character before displaying "the vision". I didn't catch that they were visions/dream/inner-mind until I watched the clip a third time. Of course, I miss really big things all the time One other thing that *I* would do is speed up the double clap after meditation. It doesn't look sharp enough.

 

Of course, I am old, fat, and have not even talked about akido in 15 years.... (and did plenty little 15 years ago)

 

Bill

[Sharky]

Hi Guys!

 

Jon wrote:

i like the mood.. you've captured the candlelight very well, but the flickering seems to flare up now and again... was this intended?

 

Of course ,the flickering was intended!

 

i'd also second yves' suggestion to keep the camera in motion. where you do, it enhances the depth of the image, and well... keep things moving.

 

I fixed only my movie's long,unfortunately I don't enough spare time in now!

If I will be spare time a bit,then I will make the camera motions and I will make the rendering process, because my computer is very slow!

 

Yves wrote:

Check your link address. It doesn't work for me. I get a 404 error.

 

The link is good just the uploading was finishing!

Check the link again!

 

Guys, I thank your comments again!

 

Cheers..

 

Sharky